Thursday, 6 October 2011

A quick list of lists that might conceivably show up anywhere, given the tendency of shopping lists to wander off. Perhaps even at the bottom of that treasure chest your heroes are opening:

  1. A list of instructions for using the dungeon the heroes have just conquered, warning that catastropic failure (i.e. the place falling down) is likely to result if the things on it aren't followed very carefully. Which they haven't been.
  2. A list of warranty provisions for a magic sword, that your hero then has to follow, making fight scenes that much harder. No use against class 2 Things. No use more than twice per cycle of the moon.
  3. A list of evil overlords invited to a gala ball, which must be recovered at all costs so that someone can work out a seating plan that doesn't involve them all killing one another.
  4. A recipe or list of ingredients for the Big Red Eye's eye drops, essential for currying favour with that most despicable of villains.
  5. A list of wizardly nicknames, so that a new wizard can find a hue that hasn't been taken already.
  6. A list of monsters for heroes, arranged like those lists birdwatchers have of rare birds, only slightly more than spotting will probably be involved.
  7. A list of the contents of a magical library, which must be found if the hero doesn't want to spend the next three centuries cataloguing.
  8. A list of people to be eliminated by a gnomish hit man (what, you didn't think they were standing in your garden for no reason, did you?) 

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