Wednesday, 25 August 2010

Rainy Day Blogfest

This is for the rainy day blogfest. It says something fairly sad that the thing I most associate with rain is cricket. Well, that and imaginary rain creatures. I hope you enjoy it.

Per sat in the cricket ground’s stand and listened to the raindrops as they fell around her. Big ones, little ones, awkward ones that slithered inside the collar of her raincoat. The ground staff dragged the covers out onto the pitch for the fifth time today.

‘Excuse me, miss?’ Per hadn’t heard the man approach. Or his two heavily built colleagues, either. She should really have spotted him, given the brightness of his red and yellow blazer. ‘Would you come with us for a minute?’

‘But they might be back on soon.’

Per swore as the two larger men took hold of her arms and lifted her between them. ‘You can’t do this. I’m-’

‘We know what you are,’ the first man said. ‘Please don’t be difficult.’

They dragged her to a room at the top of the pavilion, where an older man sat at one side of a desk, reading a file. They deposited Per in a chair.

‘What’s going on?’ Per demanded. ‘Who are you? You have no right-’

‘Actually, we do.’ The man opposite her put down the file. Per saw that it had “Persistent Light Drizzle” at the top. How had they got her full name? ‘As for who I am, you can call me the major. Have you heard of the MCC’s paranormal division?’

Per shuddered. She’d heard rumours about the men in red and yellow.

‘Cricket is a delicate game,’ the major said. ‘So vulnerable to the weather. Especially in a world with sun birds and storm gods, rain dancers and cloud dragons. And rain nymphs, of course.’

‘You know what I am?’ Per was impressed, despite her fear.

‘Of course.’ The major steepled his fingers. ‘What we don’t know, oddly, is why you’re here. We’ve run checks, obviously, and there doesn’t seem to be any sign of bookies paying you for the draw. Or the opposition team, either, and you’d think they’d welcome it, the way their middle order has been going. Of course, if you had been doing that, you would have been in quite a bit of trouble.’

Per could imagine. Or at least, she could imagine enough not to want to imagine.

‘My own guess,’ the major said, ‘is that you actually like the game.’

Per nodded. ‘I do like it. Running about. People hitting sixes. They look so happy. Well… until the rain arrives. I’m sorry. I really can’t help it.’

‘I know, which is why I’ve bought you this.’ He handed Per a square of cardboard.

‘A ticket to Australia?’ Per glanced around nervously. ‘I’m being deported?’

‘Nothing like that. We’d just like you to help your country. It’s an Ashes year, after all, and… well, I’m afraid that without a little help from the weather, our boys could be in some trouble. Will you help?’

Per nodded so fast that the water in her raincoat splashed around her ears.

‘That’s settled then,’ the major said. ‘Cucumber sandwiches all round to celebrate, I think.’


Ted Cross said...

Very funny. I had to adjust my thinking part way through, because it took me a bit to realize it was meant to be funny rather than serious. So, this is a character that brings rain with her whereever she goes?

Damyanti said...

“Persistent Light Drizzle”


I love her, and the idea of a rain-fairy who brings rain wherever she goes :)

Amie McCracken said...

Very creative characters. Love the use of a cute name, Per, as a short for a kind of scientific name.

I feel so sorry for her that she just wants to watch the game but she keeps making it rain.

Brenda Drake said...

I love the premise of this story. Sounds fun. There's a lot you can have her do with rain. I stumbled on her nickname a couple of times at first until I got use to it. Great job!

Michelle Gregory said...

great scene. makes me want to read the whole story and find out what's up with her changing the weather.

Nicole Murray said...

This was truly funny. Thank you for sharing this unique approach.

Summer Ross said...

a water nymph...very interesting. I would be curious to see where all this is headed. thanks for posting.

RaShelle said...

Stu - I love cucumber sandwiches. LOL. This was fun. Enjoyed reading very much.
And I always forget about "steepled his fingers" but that is a great description. =D

Tessa Conte said...

HAH! Very funny. Had a moment of "huh?" because Per is a male name in my head but 'persistent light drizzle'...GREAT!

I love the way you write, really I do.

Eric W. Trant said...

Ah, I see, now. I missed the Per = Persistent Light Drizzle part. I'm a bit obtuse sometimes.

I did get thrown by the constant interjection of descriptions amidst the dialogue. Bunch up dialogue with dialogue, and descriptions with descriptions. It's all right sometimes, but it seems that your muse likes to write half its dialogue, add some descriptors, and then finish the dialogous thoughts at the end of the paragraph.

I like the premise of they nymph bringing rain but loving cricket! That's freaking awesome because it's so ironic and sad.

- Eric

E. Arroyo said...

I like its quirkyness. It was a great read. I did get a bit confused by her name. It's different. LOL

Franklin Beaumont said...

Ha! Quirky and inventive, Funny and quintessentially English. Cucumber sandwiches all round, I think.

Wendy Tyler Ryan said...

Very nicely done. This has a wonderful "feel" to it and well written. The only teensy, weensy thing that felt like "too much information" was the one paragraph stuffed with all of the mythical beings. You had me at "Persistent Light Drizzle". At that moment, I instantly knew what was going on and I kept chuckling until the end.

Thanks for sharing. Well don.

Raquel Byrnes said...

What a great twist on the topic! Great idea. I loved the line about the awkward raindrops.

Loved your entry.

Edge of Your Seat Romance

Will Burke said...

A rain nymph working for a cricket league? Brilliant! I wish I'd thought of it. And I laughed at the "cucumber sandwich" punchline! Thanks for stopping by!

Amanda Borenstadt said...

That was so adorable! :D

I love Per. I want to be her. "Persistent Light Drizzle." LOL

VR Barkowski said...

Good Lord, I just realized how American my sensibilities are. You said cricket, I thought insect. I read the first line three times before the light went on. How embarrassing.

Very clever piece, funny, but touching, too. Poor Per. I'm glad her abilities will be put to good use in Australia. Plus she'll still get to enjoy a match or two.

Donna Hole said...

This is such a guy scene LOL.

But it was very entertaining.


Belinda (Worderella) said...

I loved this! Very Jasper Fforde of you. Cleverly done.

jcmartinfighterwriter said...

Ted Cross took the words right out of my mouth. I was thinking this was going to be something serious and suspenseful, then realise the MC is some sort of rain spirit. Light-hearted and well-written. Trust the British to resort to relying on the weather for their cricket results!

Christine H said...

This was great! I loved it. I feel that I am missing out somehow, being an American. I don't understand cricket at all, but I wish I did.

Thanks so much for participating!